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Lea aquí la recopilación de textos de Enrique Martínez Reguera 
Escrito por 1984 el domingo, 30 de marzo de 2008

Estoy convencido de que a este chiquillo nos le enviaron de la Safa porque era homosexual, aunque a nosotros nada nos dijeron ni falta que hacía. Entonces no era como ahora, considerarle así era como tenerle por tarado o vicioso y podía acarrearle todo género de escarnios y repudio. Al menos en eso parece que algo hayamos mejorado.

Cuando nos llegó este crío tenía once años, era asustadizo y andaba siempre muy solo; con los adultos procuraba ser zalamero, muy zalamero; pero nosotros debíamos resultarle desapacibles en exceso, porque siempre le sorprendíamos en cierta pose como de actor novel declamando.

Los jueves y domingos se evadía de casa y sin decírselo a nadie se iba a un cine de sesión continua, un cine de barrio poco recomendable que de haberlo sabido yo hubiera desaprobado.

También ignorábamos que tuviese más familia que un hermano, porque a las instituciones no les constaba o les constaba que no.

Cuando nos lo enviaron nadie le preguntó si estaba conforme con venir a nuestra casa, ni siquiera nosotros se lo preguntamos, no éramos cabales todavía sobre la necesidad de que los chiquillos protagonicen las decisiones que sobre ellos se tomen.

Al poco tiempo de estar conviviendo con nosotros, un matrimonio sin hijos al que creíamos conocer, le propuso y nos propuso hacerse cargo él e incluso adoptarle. A las instituciones les parecía bien y al crío le pareció de maravilla librarse de nuestro pequeño tiberio para irse a lugar más apacible.

Así pues empezamos a facilitarles el que fueran conociendo, ¡terrible espejismo!, ¿cómo íbamos a sospechar que ya el primer sábado en que se quedó a dormir en aquella casa, nos lo iban a despachar con cajas destempladas como si tuviera la peste?

-¡Este chaval que nos has endosado es marica! -increparon-.

Sólo entonces fue cuando estalló con toda su fuerza un problema que hasta aquel momento el niño no se había arriesgado a confiarme, seguramente porque nos consideraba cómplices la institución tutelar: y es que vivía obsesionado por encontrar a su madre, por recuperarla.

El vacío que algunos de estos niños sienten de su madre, cuando no la tienen a mano, puede ser atroz, les persigue toda la infancia, a veces también cuando ya son mayores: la ansían, idealizan, la subliman. Por eso en hospicios y reformatorios tan frecuente el que los niños lleven un tatuaje algún lugar de su cuerpo, y siempre con el mismo mensaje: “amor de madre”. Si en la vida te empieza por ahí ¿no les parece que deberían empezar por ahí los que de verdad quieren ayudar a estos niños?.

Desde el mismo instante en que nos lo dijo decidimos prestar todo nuestro apoyo a tan acuciante y contrariada devoción. Aproveché la consideración que por entonces me tenían en la Junta y en el Tribunal para indagar en sus archivos, hablé con los educadores que pudieran haberla conocido, con los más veteranos.., pero todas mis pesquisas resultaron inútiles. El por su parte también hizo averiguaciones, algún antiguo compañero le sugirió el nombre de un barrio, pero tampoco logró mucho más.

    Dos años después de iniciado aquel rastreo me dijo un día exultante de gozo:

-    Ya sé en dónde vive e iré a visitarla.
-    ¿Quieres que te acompañe? podemos ir juntos.
-    ¡Ni se te ocurra! es mi problema, prefiero ir yo solo.

    Cuando regresó traía un gesto entre desencantado y displicente.

-    ¿Cómo te ha ido?
-    Bien. Pero ya no tengo nada que hacer allí. Nadie me echa de menos. No pienso volver. No te preocupes, ni cicatriz me habrá de quedar, te lo juro.


    Fue como cuando se desvanece un hechizo. Ya nunca más volvió a sentir ansiedad por encontrar su manantial. Pero al mismo tiempo siguió sin encontrar en nuestra casa su reposo.

Cuando tuvo quince años, como era tan dado al espectáculo, acordó con nosotros ingresar en la escuela de circo y cine que tenía el Padre Silva en la Ciudad de los Muchachos de Ourense.

Yo siempre he sentido una enorme admiración por el Padre Silva, que ya estaba abriendo caminos mucho antes de que yo pudiese iniciarlos.

Hace unos cuarenta años un joven seminarista que descendía de la familia Feijó famosa por el circo que llevaba ese nombre, puso en marcha una aventura que consistía en recoger y enderezar a los chavales más granujas de su ciudad, una aventura que luego extendió al mundo entero

Silva, siguiendo el modelo que el Padre Flánagan había creado en Estados Unidos a principios de siglo XX, instauró una ciudad de muchachos, un hermosa utopía con la que soñaba sacar de la indigencia a todos aquellos chavales de la calle para transformarlos en ciudadanos instruidos honestos.

Por eso me duele haber leído recientemente en un periódico de ámbito estatal el rótulo: “Triste final del Circo de los Muchachos” (El Mundo, 5-XI-2004). El Padre Silva llegó a crear un emporio de dignidad y altruismo y eso no se lo puede perdonar la plutocracia global desparramada. No se lo pueden perdonar todos los que sueñan con repartirse sus despojos. Desdichado país, dijo Bertold Bretch, que necesita de tales héroes.

No sé cómo resolverán el embrollo, ni siquiera sé si mis palabras de aliento le podrán llegar al Padre Silva, pero me encantaría que supiese que mucha gente en todo el mundo le admiramos y queremos, y al menos en un ápice hemos tratado de imitarle. Nobleza obliga. Y desde luego, si con semejantes ordalías logran quitarnos los sueños para invadimos de pesadillas, será para echarse definitivamente a temblar.

El caso es que nuestro chaval allá se nos fue a Ourense, con el Padre Silva.

Pero tampoco allí cuajó y tuvo que retomar al poco tiempo. Aunque no volviese como se había ido, sino mucho más sosegado y más hecho, más maduro.

Por exceso de protagonismo solemos vivir como fracasos estas idas y venidas que no prosperan. Pero los chavales no maduran gracias a un determinado programa, o una institución, o una persona en concreto, sino que como las plantas pueden beneficiarse de todo, del sol, del frío, de la lluvia, del viento. Cuando hay raíces todas esas cosas hacen su labor. Sólo cuando hay raíces. Y en nuestra casa el chaval sin notarlo iba echando sus raíces. Nuestra casa se le iba convirtiendo en su casa, éramos su referencia por omisión, su pertenencia, ese arraigo del que tanto necesitan los chiquillos, el lugar en donde sabes que nunca te van a fallar después de intentar otra cosa.

El motivo puntual de su vuelta al hogar fue que se le declaró una extraña enfermedad en la piema izquierda, de manera tal que la masa muscular le iba disminuyendo y empezaba a cojear. En Ourense anduvo de médico en médico y luego también con nosotros en Madrid. Estuvo ingresado en dos hospitales en donde le estudiaron a fondo, pero nadie halló una explicación coherente.

Por nuestra parte tuvimos la ingenuidad o la osadía de imaginar que, tal como era, se tratase de una somatización de carácter histérico.
Propusimos a los médicos que considerasen esa posibilidad. Me costó el que me montaran una encerrona de lo más desagradable e intimidatoria. Pero el tiempo nos fue más condescendiente y la zanca se le fue volviendo a lo suyo sin pedirle permiso a ningún galeno. De hecho aquella dolencia nunca más le molestó.

En cuanto tuvo edad Quique se puso a trabajar. Los chavales muy activos en condiciones normales son laboriosos y Quique lo era. Entró como distribuidor en una empresa que vendía enciclopedias a domicilio. Como era además tan seductor y zalamero le endilgaba su mercancía a todos sus amigos y a nuestros amigos y a los amigos de todos los amigos; y los paganos o sea, nosotros, tan contentos de verle trabajando con tanta ilusión. La empresa tenía sus oficinas en un edificio lujoso frente a los Juzgados de Plaza Castilla; él solito se había encontrado el trabajo en los anuncios de los periódicos. Los contratos eran mensuales con posibilidad de renovación.

Cada mañana se formaban increíbles aglomeraciones de muchachos, en la puerta de aquel edificio, en busca de ocupación y sustento. Jornada tras jornada cargaban su mercancía y cumplida la tarea entregaban la recaudación. Cuando el esfuerzo del mes concluyó y llegó el día de la cobranza, aquella multitud adolescente acudió a por su salario.., pero la flamante empresa había desaparecido sin dejar ni rastro; ironías de la vida, a perro flaco todas son pulgas y aún encima les llamarán rateros. Y eso que en aquellas época apenas si sabíamos aún del trabajo basura.

Si la política es la guerra por otros medios, esto que le ocurrió a nuestro Quique será también la libertad del mercado laboral por otros medios. Un par de años después, por puro azar, en un viaje que hizo el chaval a Canarias, se encontró el mismo anuncio de la misma empresa en los periódicos isleños.

Ya mayor se empleó en una conocida cafetería gay del barrio de Chueca. Un día vino a hablar conmigo y me contó que era homosexual, que había conocido a un chiquito que le gustaba y que nos lo quería presentar porque pensaban vivir en pareja.

Marta y yo fuimos a comer con ellos, con la misma alegría y la misma pena que lo hacen otros papás en vísperas de la boda de un hijo. Se les notaba que se querían cantidad.

El chaval conserva hacia nosotros sentimientos muy filiales. Nos conformábamos con haberle servido de cauce pero él nos mima como si de verdad constituyéramos su familia.
160 Comentarios Temas relacionados: Sociedad  De tanta rabia... Tanto Cariño  Pedagogía 

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